Typhoid
12th January 2004, 15:09
Dietary and Healthy Lifestyle Wisdom!!
Q, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life.
Is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's
it...don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out
eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live
longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your
car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow
eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak
is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering
vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is
also a good source of field grass
(green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of
your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body, and you have body fat, your
ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is
two to one, etc.
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating a regular
exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No
Pain...Good.
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: You're not listening. Foods are fried these days in
vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could
getting more vegetables be bad for you?
Q: What's the secret to healthy eating?
A: Thicker gravy.
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft
around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets
bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger
stomach.
Q: Is eating chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO ...... Cocoa beans ... another
vegetable!!! It's the best feel good food around!
Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may
have had about food and lifestyle.
Q, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life.
Is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's
it...don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out
eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live
longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your
car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.
Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow
eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak
is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering
vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is
also a good source of field grass
(green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of
your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.
Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body, and you have body fat, your
ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is
two to one, etc.
Q: What are some of the advantages of participating a regular
exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No
Pain...Good.
Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: You're not listening. Foods are fried these days in
vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could
getting more vegetables be bad for you?
Q: What's the secret to healthy eating?
A: Thicker gravy.
Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft
around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets
bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger
stomach.
Q: Is eating chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO ...... Cocoa beans ... another
vegetable!!! It's the best feel good food around!
Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may
have had about food and lifestyle.